From the mind of a 2-year old...
Scene: Costco (surprised?). E asks me for some water, so I get her a cup and press the water tab on the fountain drink machine. Of note, it happens to be connected to the pink lemonade dispenser and I suppose a little got mixed into her water.
Me: Here's your water!
E: It's apple juice.
Me: No, it's water.
E: Grabs my arm and pulls me towards her, looks straight into my eyes and says demonstratively,"Look at me. It tastes like apple juice."
Scene: early morning as I'm waking her up to get ready for school
Me: Good morning!
Elle, still in a sleepy stupor: I need to get dressed. I need to go see if the pool is closed.
I haven't a clue why this was her request, but she clearly felt strongly about it, so we went. At 6:30am. It was closed.
Scene: Dinner table. Elle wanted to take "a big bite" of my burger instead of the small pieces I had cut for her, so I handed it to her.
Me: May I have my burger back now?
Elle, pointing to my plate: Need to eat your green beans first.
Touche, Elle. Touche.
Scene: a few hours after Elle's first haircut. E spies a Barbie compact in the diaper bag.
Elle: I neeed the mirror! I need to find my haircut!
Scene: While staying at Sandy and Clay's house during our trip to Montana, E helped let their dog out to do his business, supervised the poo cleanup, etc.
Elle: Need to get the poop out.
Sandy, thinking she was referring to the dog: Where is the poop?
Elle: In my bottom.