On the way to one of my (childless) colleague's house for a cookout, after having bought an industrial-sized pack of Barbie panties at Costco: Good thing I have all these panties... in case they ask me to spend the night!
|Probably not going to happen E, but way to be prepared...|
Me: Sweetheart, you've had 2 cupcakes, cookies, chips, and a popsicle at school today!
Elle: You forgot the gummy worms.
|You're not helping your case there, kiddo...|
E (running off to the playroom): I've been spending too long doing grown-up stuff... time to play!"
Overheard from the playroom (singing): "I'll marry you once, I'll marry you twiiiice, but I won't marry you naked, Belle"
|I'm probably going to get censored from Blogger for this...|
When said repairman finally arrived (8 hours late) he is accosted by Elle, hands on hips: Where were you? We've been waiting. I had to miss the dentist and my teeth feel yucky!
|Don't offend him until he fixes the air, My Sassy One.|
|I told her how to spell Thank You and she wrote this. Not bad for a 3 year old...|
Friend's Mom to Friend's Dad: Travis, did you get the keys?
Elle: Why did she call you Travis?
Friend's Dad: Because that's my name.
Elle: I don't think that can be a person's name. How about Tristan?
After waking up from nap to find that Aunt Stephanie and Uncle Brice had left for the airport after a quick weekend visit: This is the worst day ever! Send them a picture of my sad face!"
|Seriously, does it get more pitiful than this? Heart. Breaking.|
Elle: Does she get cake?
Me: No, she's not quite big enough for cake yet.
Elle: Well, can I have her cake then?
Me: Elle, can you please pick up that toy you left on the ground?
Elle: I can't, it will hurt my back.
Me, sternly: Elle, you will not get a backache from picking up your toys.
Elle: Pause. Giggle. Mom, that sounds like something a sheep would eat.... Baaaaa-cake!
Me, totally perplexed and finally getting it: It's sad when your kid's jokes are already over your head.